5 Petitions For Things Less Important To National Prosperity Than A Death Star

So much is less important, obviously. But these things especially.

By Colin LecherPosted 12.17.2012 at 12:00 pm10 Comments

Death Star YouTube

The people have spoken. A White House petition to begin construction of a Death Star by 2016has reached the 25,000-signature threshold, meaning the White House now has to respond.

President Obama: We've entreated you to tackle some significant science and tech issues before, but now we really need your help. And, anyhow, look at all of these things that are way, WAY less important than the construction of a Death Star.

Texas wants to secede, for example.

First of all, Texas, cut it out. Second of all, go ahead and secede, and when we have a Death Star, surely you will reconsider your position.

Also Louisiana wants to secede.

A lot of other states, actually.

Secession Petitions:  whitehouse.gov

Nationalizing the Twinkie industry has been proposed, too, and while that's clearly an endeavor worthy of presidential consideration, there is still no way that deserves the attention of a Death Star. Why are we bailing out the confection industry one-percenters when so many jobs would be created by the construction of a Death Star?

And Anna Wintour is being considered for the position of ambassador to somewhere, which more than 4,000 people apparently do not like. Not even close to Death Star worthiness.

Folks against mandatory vaccinations are also making a petition, but even they must agree that a Death Star is a great improvement to Homeland Security.

Mr. President: We recognize the naysayers who claim this project will cost 13,000 times the world's GDP, and find their lack of faith disturbing. We patiently await word on the government's progress.

Kepler Spots a Planet Orbiting Two Suns, Just Like Star Wars' Tatooine

A mournful French horn blows. An angsty Luke Skywalker stomps out of his aunt and uncle's sand hut and peers up at Tatooine's double sunset, his hair blowing in the breeze. It's a memorable scene from Star Wars—but now, a precedent for such a sky with two suns has been found in our universe.

Using data from the Kepler space observatory, scientists at the Harvard-Smithsonian Center for Astrophysics and SETI have discovered for the first time a planet orbiting a binary star system, passing in front of both its parent stars along its orbit.

The planet, Kepler-16b, resembles Saturn in its mass and gaseous makeup. That mostly rules out the possibility of any living beings being present to enjoy the double sunset view, although chances are good Kepler-16b has an icy, non-gaseous satellite or two, as Saturn does.

The two stars in the system are 20% and 69% as massive as our sun, respectively. The planet orbits at a distance analogous to Venus's orbit in our solar system, which typically would place it within the "habitable zone" of planets that could support life. But since the combined mass of the two stars is still less than our sun, Kepler-16b's Venus-like orbit is most likely a cold one.

An animation of Kepler-16b's orbit:

Binary star systems, first cataloged at length by English astronomer William Herschel in the early 19th century, are key to our understanding of distant stars, since it's easy to derive each star's mass by studying their linked orbit (the two stars in a binary system both orbit around their shared center of mass). But whether or not such systems, which by some estimates account for about half of the stars in the known universe, could form and support orbiting planets has been a contentious topic--making today's finding significant not just for Star Wars fans.

"It's been pretty much a split vote amongst the theorists," said Alan Boss, a theoretical astrophysicist at the Carnegie Institution for Science, and a co-author of the Kepler 16-b paper. "Some say 'Yeah, we think it's possible to make a Saturn-mass object [in a binary star system].' Other papers say 'Well, no, we don't think it's going to work at all, because those changing gravitational forces from that central binary are going to screw up the process of trying to get little bodies to run into each other and grow bigger and bigger.'"

"One of the exciting things about this is: Kepler, as usual, has answered the question for us," said Boss.

The Kepler observatory's mission is to find and analyze potential Earth-like exoplanets throughout the universe. Today's discovery now significantly expands the working set of stars that could potentially harbor orbiting planets. That means more work for Kepler as it continues what has so far been an extremely successful mission.

The paper, authored primarily by Laurence Doyle of the SETI institute, appears in the journalScience today.

Star Wars voice reel: Part One/two

Most of his impressions are very good ;)

Epic Jedi Gang Fight

VW Dark Side – Greenpeace Star Wars Parody 1 & 2

Not into Greenpeace or anything, but cute with a good message.

Mass Effect 2 Garrus Cosplay

Robert Rodgers' costumes are a work of art. His attention to detail is amazing. Check out his work.

http://www.mywickedarmor.com